The Self-Loved ADHD Woman Way®️
The Self-Loved ADHD Woman Way is a podcast for ADHD Women Entrepreneurs who are ready to overcome the inner and outer challenges of ADHD and break free from neurotypical rules and expectations to create a business that works with their ADHD brain. Together we’ll explore our unique ADHD brains and how to work with them effectively, with ADHD-specific tools and strategies so that you can create and build a meaningful and prosperous business (and life) you love. The Self-Loved Woman Way is hosted by Jen Barnes, MSW, LICSW, RYT500, TCTSY-F, a clinical social worker and psychotherapist turned ADHD Entrepreneur coach and educator. She has a passion for working with women who are late-diagnosed or self-diagnosed ADHD as well as those who are ADHD adjacent. Prior to becoming a clinical social worker and psychotherapist specializing in complex trauma, Jen was an actuarial analyst for nearly four years for a large Minnesota-based company working in retirement plans. She has a Bachelors of Science in Mathematics with a concentration in Actuarial Science and a minor in Computer Science, that started out as an accounting degree with numerous business courses. An entrepreneur herself, she owns and operates two business - one, a full time private psychotherapy practice (since 2014) and the other a Digital Business empowering ADHD women entrepreneurs to move beyond ADHD challenges and create a business that replaces their full time income in 12 months. Jen’s unique blend of education and experiences as an ADHD woman and psychotherapist coupled with her history and experience in business offers a special twist on navigating the world of entrepreneurship as an ADHD woman. Further, her expertise in serving women with complex trauma histories offering an additional, deeper layer to the work of overcoming the pain and even trauma of growing up ADHD in a world not designed for us. This podcast is a fantastic place to embrace your ADHD (yes, even the challenges), explore ADHD specific ways to work and live in this neurotypcial society, and learn ADHD specific strategies for creating and growing your own business so you can have the time and energy to do more of what you love.
Listen on:
Episodes
5 days ago
5 days ago
🎧 ADHD Self-Doubt – How to Stop Chasing External Answers and Do What Works
If you're an ADHD woman who's ever thought, "Maybe I just need one more course, one more expert, one more answer to finally figure it all out," you're not alone—and this episode is for you.
In this raw, eye-opening conversation, Jen shares her personal journey through self-doubt, perfectionism, and a $55,000 wake-up call that exposed just how much she had been outsourcing her power. From over-functioning to over-spending in search of external solutions, she breaks down how even high-achieving ADHD women can fall into the trap of thinking someone else must know better.
You’ll learn:
Why ADHD women are conditioned to look outside themselves for answers
How masking and people-pleasing erode self-trust and inner clarity
What it really means to connect with your inner wisdom (and why it’s essential for success)
Two simple but powerful practices to begin rebuilding self-trust and reconnecting with your creativity and confidence today
Whether you're navigating business, career, or personal growth with ADHD, this episode will help you pause, reflect, and remember that you already have wisdom inside you—you just haven’t been taught how to listen to it yet.
Timestamps:0:00 – Introduction: The exhausting cycle of seeking answers3:20 – A personal story of self-doubt and high achievement7:45 – $55,000 later: what didn’t work and why14:10 – Why ADHD women are taught to distrust themselves18:05 – The emotional cost of masking and fitting in24:30 – Naming your self-doubt and validating your experience29:55 – Two tools to reconnect with inner wisdom33:20 – How silence and stream-of-consciousness writing unlock clarity38:00 – Wrapping up and an invitation to deepen your work
Mentioned in this episode:→ ASCEND: The ADHD Women’s Mastery Program – A powerful program for ADHD women who are ready to stop coping and start leading with clarity, confidence, and sustainable strategies. Includes 1:1 coaching, small group support, and grounded growth frameworks.
Learn more here and enroll: https://jenbarnes.org/the-adhd-women-entrepreneurs-mastery-program/
If you enjoyed this episode:🌱 Follow the podcast💬 Share it with a friend who over-functions and second-guesses📝 Leave a review so more ADHD women can find this message📥 Ready to stop spinning your wheels? Work with Jen inside ASCEND
Join my ADHD Professional Women’s email club here: https://jenbarnes.kit.com/email-club
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenbarneslicsw/
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Tags for SEO:ADHD self-doubt, ADHD women, ADHD and overfunctioning, ADHD masking, ADHD emotional regulation, self-trust with ADHD, how to stop outsourcing decisions, reconnect with intuition ADHD, ADHD coaching
Wednesday May 28, 2025
Wednesday May 28, 2025
In this episode of the ADHD Success Coach Podcast, Jen breaks down:
Why ADHD women are more sensitive to blood sugar crashes and sugar spikes
How sugar gives a dopamine hit—but causes a crash that worsens ADHD symptoms
What the stress response has to do with your lunch (yep, really!)
The impact of perimenopause on ADHD and food sensitivities
What kinds of carbs support your brain—and which ones dysregulate you
How to build ADHD-friendly meals and snacks using protein, fiber, fat, and hydration
Red flags that your blood sugar is dysregulating you
Easy food swaps for real energy and focus—without giving up joy
👀 You’ll also learn why hangry anxiety, afternoon fog, and sugar cravings might not be personal flaws… but signs your nervous system needs better fuel.
Be sure to listen!
Join my ADHD Professional Women’s email club here: https://jenbarnes.kit.com/email-club
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenbarneslicsw/
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Wednesday May 21, 2025
Wednesday May 21, 2025
You’ve got the planners, the timers, the dopamine-boosting routines. You’re doing all the things… So why do you still feel stuck?
In this special 100th episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on the hidden emotional obstacles that quietly sabotage even the smartest, most resourced ADHD women. I’m talking about fear, self-doubt, and insecurity—not the loud kind, but the kind that hides behind perfectionism, people-pleasing, and overfunctioning.
We’ll explore:
How unresolved emotional patterns from growing up with ADHD still shape your day-to-day
Why you might be doing everything “right” and still struggling to follow through
How to stop bracing against judgment and start building from a place of safety and self-trust
A powerful mindset shift that can help you move forward your way
This one’s for the high-achieving ADHD woman who’s tired of pushing through and ready to start feeling aligned, confident, and capable—without having to mask who she is.
✨ Ready to go deeper? Join me inside ASCEND: The ADHD Women’s Mastery Program—my 3-part system to help you overcome the inner and outer challenges of ADHD to work well and live fully. Learn more here: https://jenbarnes.org/the-adhd-women-entrepreneurs-mastery-program/
Join my ADHD Professional Women’s email club here: https://jenbarnes.kit.com/email-club
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenbarneslicsw/
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Wednesday May 14, 2025
Wednesday May 14, 2025
If you’ve ever thought, “Why can’t I just do the things?”—this conversation is for you.
In this episode, I’m joined by Jesse J. Anderson—also known as @ADHDJesse—author of the bestselling book Extra Focus: The Quick Start Guide to Adult ADHD. Jesse shares what it was like to be diagnosed in adulthood, how undiagnosed ADHD impacted his career and relationships, and what changed when he started working with his brain instead of against it.
We talk about:
The real signs of adult ADHD that often get missed (especially in high-functioning adults)
Workplace strategies for ADHD professionals and how to advocate for what you need
The emotional impact of late diagnosis and how to move from shame to radical acceptance
The ADHD tax and why systems need to change—not just us
Why self-compassion and humor might be the most powerful ADHD tools of all
This isn’t just theory. Jesse brings lived experience, practical strategies, and deep validation for anyone trying to succeed in a world that wasn’t built for your brain.
📘 Get Jesse’s Book: Extra Focus: The Quick Start Guide to Adult ADHD The ADHD-friendly guide Jesse wishes he had when he was first diagnosed. Fast, funny, and incredibly helpful.
📬 Sign up for Jesse’s Weekly Newsletter: Packed with practical ADHD strategies, stories, and support: https://extrafocus.com
👋 Follow Jesse on Socials: Instagram, TikTok, X (Twitter), Threads: @ADHDJesse
👩💼 More Support for ADHD Women: If you're a professional or entrepreneurial woman navigating ADHD, download my free 5-Step Task Master Plan to stop the spiral of overwhelm and actually finish the things that matter: https://jenbarnes.org/taskmaster
🧠 Love the episode? Like, share, or review to help more ADHD women find compassionate, real-talk support.
Join my ADHD Professional Women’s email club here: https://jenbarnes.kit.com/email-club
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenbarneslicsw/
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Wednesday May 07, 2025
Wednesday May 07, 2025
Ever feel like your brain is both frozen AND scattered at the same time? Like you feel that vibrating, urgency type energy in your body but you just can’t even?
This happened to me TODAY - the day I had an entirely different podcast episode I wanted to record. It was like a sign from the universe to share what you can do when this happens.
In this episode we’ll explore what this feels like, what is happening, and how to come out of it without shame (or at least less shame if you still have parts of you hell-bent on shaming).
You’ll walk away feeling both validated (hopefully) and with clear steps of what to do when this happens to you.
🎧✨Be sure to listen!
28-DAY CHALLENGE TO REGULATE YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM WITH ADHD
This is an affordable challenge that helps you get the result you seek (a more regulated nervous system) with the least investment possible of your money, time, and energy.
Challenges start at the beginning of the month so if registration isn’t open, you can join the priority notification list (on the pop-up)
Sign up for the challenge here: https://jenbarnes.org/adhd-get-regulated-challenge/
Join my ADHD Professional Women’s email club here: https://jenbarnes.kit.com/email-club
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenbarneslicsw/
Instagram: @i_am_jen_barnes
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Wednesday Apr 30, 2025
Wednesday Apr 30, 2025
If motivation feels like it comes in hot and then vanishes without warning, you’re not broken—and you’re definitely not alone.
In this episode, I’m getting real about what it takes to cultivate sustainable motivation when you have ADHD. I’m sharing why the usual advice ("just be more disciplined") doesn’t work for our brains, and what to do instead.
I’ll walk you through the science of motivation and dopamine, and five ADHD-friendly strategies that actually help you start things—and keep going. Plus, I’ll talk about the importance of making progress visible, building rhythms instead of rigid routines, and how nervous system regulation is a game-changer for getting your energy and focus back.
Oh—and I’ll also share a story about a recent 6-hour work block that totally flopped… and what it taught me about motivation and ADHD.
💡 In this episode:
Why ADHD motivation is emotional, not logical
5 strategies to spark motivation that don’t rely on willpower
How to reset when your drive disappears
The surprising truth about routines and rest for ADHD brains
My go-to productivity app for staying on track
🛠 Tools I Mentioned:
I shared my favorite productivity app, Akiflow — it helps me manage tasks, time-block effectively, and reduce the chaos of bouncing between tools.Use my affiliate link (below) to get a discount, (I do receive a small commission if you sign up). It’s a tool I personally use and recommend to my ADHD clients.
Get Akiflow here: https://web.akiflow.com/referral?name=SmVu&referral=z4OYO6To3wteUSCr
🎧✨Be sure to listen!
28-DAY CHALLENGE TO REGULATE YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM WITH ADHD
This is an affordable challenge that helps you get the result you seek (a more regulated nervous system) with the least investment possible of your money, time, and energy.
Challenges start at the beginning of the month so if registration isn’t open, you can join the priority notification list (on the pop-up)
Sign up for the challenge here: https://jenbarnes.org/adhd-get-regulated-challenge/
Join my ADHD Professional Women’s email club here: https://jenbarnes.kit.com/email-club
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
Instagram: @i_am_jen_barnes
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Wednesday Apr 23, 2025
Wednesday Apr 23, 2025
Do you find yourself feeling guilty or even ashamed of your anger? Or maybe you have people telling you not to get so upset? (Or even a spouse who tells you that you have an “anger problem” when the reality is you are the one carry all of the mental load and most of the physical load of your household?)You are not alone. Unfortunately, this is not uncommon for women.
The problem is, our rage, our anger is both valid and necessary. It sends us the message that something isn’t okay and encourages us to take action to address it.
But most so-called “anger management” programs are ineffective.
So in this episode, we dive into the problems people have with anger, why they’re there, what anger really is and how it can help us, and I’ll share my process to effectively work with your anger so it doesn’t plague you or come out when you least expect it in an unproductive way.
AND, at the end I’ll share about how to help yourself with an opportunity for nervous system regulation with ADHD.
🎧✨Be sure to listen!
28-DAY CHALLENGE TO REGULATE YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM WITH ADHD
This is an affordable challenge that helps you get the result you seek (a more regulated nervous system) with the least investment possible of your money, time, and energy.
Challenges start at the beginning of the month so if registration isn’t open, you can join the priority notification list (on the pop-up)
Sign up for the challenge here: https://jenbarnes.org/adhd-get-regulated-challenge/
Join my ADHD Professional Women’s email club here: https://jenbarnes.kit.com/email-club
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
Instagram: @i_am_jen_barnes
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Wednesday Apr 16, 2025
Wednesday Apr 16, 2025
Ya know how there are things you could do that you KNOW would help your ADHD, but how you just can’t seem to do them?
If this is you, you’re not alone. This is one of the most common things I hear from ADHD women.
AND, in our last episode we explored an amazing tool from motivational interviewing to help.
BUT what if you tried it and it didn’t work? Or you can’t even get yourself to do it?
That’s what this episode is for! We’ll dive deeper into getting yourself to do the things that will actually help your ADHD so you can focus better and both start and complete tasks with greater ease!
🎧✨Be sure to listen!
28-DAY CHALLENGE TO REGULATE YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM WITH ADHD
This is an affordable challenge that helps you get the result you seek (a more regulated nervous system) with the least investment possible of your money, time, and energy.
Challenges start at the beginning of the month so if registration isn’t open, you can join the priority notification list (on the pop-up)
Sign up for the challenge here: https://jenbarnes.org/adhd-get-regulated-challenge/
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
Instagram: @i_am_jen_barnes
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Wednesday Apr 09, 2025
Wednesday Apr 09, 2025
One of the biggest struggles I see in ADHD women is getting themselves to do the things they know would help their ADHD - things I call “ADHD care”. Given the busy-ness most women, especially ADHD women, experience, plus the way our brains are wired, this makes sense. It truly can be hard to get ourselves to do stuff. AND, it’s possible.
In this episode we’ll explore the challenges of getting yourself to do your ADHD care consistently, what ADHD care really is and how it shifts, and how to get yourself to do it. I’ll even share a tool I’ve only ever shared in my paid programs for you to help yourself do this.
So if you’ve been struggling to do things that would help reduce the struggle with your ADHD, then this episode is for you.
🎧✨Be sure to listen!
28-DAY CHALLENGE TO REGULATE YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM WITH ADHD
This is an affordable challenge that helps you get the result you seek (a more regulated nervous system) with the least investment possible of your money, time, and energy.
Challenges start at the beginning of the month so if registration isn’t open, you can join the priority notification list (on the pop-up)
Sign up for the challenge here: https://jenbarnes.org/adhd-get-regulated-challenge/
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
Instagram: @i_am_jen_barnes
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
Wednesday Apr 02, 2025
Wednesday Apr 02, 2025
Today, we're diving into one of the most intense emotional struggles for ADHDers: Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, or RSD. If you've ever felt like a single comment or perceived criticism sent you into a tailspin—overthinking, self-blame, that heavy emotional crash—you are so not alone. I've been there. Recently.
But here's the good news: there's a way out of the spiral.
In this episode, I’m sharing two crucial practices that helped me stop an RSD spiral in its tracks—real talk, no fluff.
One is about embracing radical acceptance (even when it feels impossible), and the other is about regulating your nervous system to calm the emotional storm. These aren’t just theoretical tips; they’re what pulled me back from the edge just days ago.
✨ What’s in it for you? By the end of this episode, you'll have a toolkit to:
Recognize when an RSD spiral is starting
Interrupt the emotional chaos with simple, actionable strategies
Shift into calm and clarity, even when your brain feels like it’s working against you
If you've ever felt stuck in that rejection loop, this episode is your lifeline. Stay with me, and let's break the spiral together.
🎧✨Be sure to listen!
28-DAY CHALLENGE TO REGULATE YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM WITH ADHD
This is an affordable challenge that helps you get the result you seek (a more regulated nervous system) with the least investment possible of your money, time, and energy.
Challenges start at the beginning of the month so if registration isn’t open, you can join the priority notification list (on the pop-up)
Sign up for the challenge here: https://jenbarnes.org/adhd-get-regulated-challenge/
Connect with me on social media!
Youtube: @Jenbarnes
Instagram: @i_am_jen_barnes
Learn more about how we can work together: www.jenbarnes.org
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.
The Self-Loved Woman Way
WITH JEN BARNES
Welcome to The Self-Loved Woman Way podcast, where we embark on an exciting journey of embracing neurodivergence and empowering ourselves as individuals with ADHD. Join us as we challenge the conventional norms and discover innovative approaches to navigate through life with our unique minds.
In each episode, we delve into the captivating world of neurodivergence, celebrating our differences and uncovering the hidden strengths within our ADHD identities. Together, we'll explore strategies, tips, and tricks tailored to our ADHD way of thinking, helping us unlock our full potential and thrive in a world that often misunderstands us.
The Self-Loved Woman Way podcast offers a safe and supportive space for open reflection. We explore topics such as productivity hacks, organization techniques, self-care practices, and more, all designed to optimize our daily lives while embracing our authentic selves.
Through our conversations, we aim to empower listeners to love and embrace their neurodivergent identities unconditionally. No longer shall we view ADHD as a limitation but as a unique lens that grants us extraordinary perspectives and abilities. Together, we can revolutionize the way society perceives neurodivergence and create a world that celebrates the strengths and contributions of every individual.
So, whether you're neurodivergent yourself, have a loved one with ADHD, or simply want to learn more about this fascinating aspect of human diversity, The Self-Loved Woman Way is your ultimate destination for insights, inspiration, and a renewed sense of self-acceptance. Join us on this transformative journey as we embrace our neurodivergence and thrive in our own ADHD ways.
The Self-Love Woman Way—Where we redefine what it means to be neurodivergent and celebrate the brilliance within each of us.
DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast.
This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.
If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.